A Love Letter



I couldn’t go to the event without you.

All I could do was remember the anxiousness of meeting you, and how quickly I relaxed.

That rare overwhelming feeling when I saw your photo from a farmers market.

Your smile when we'd laugh, and the way you smelled when hugged.

And the instant softening of my heart when you called me darling...

I tried to think about how short the time was, but it moved fast.

You already had a key before there was a door.

Scared or anxious, all it took was one look in your eyes and it didn't matter.

Your heart... your mind... and what the world could be.

You brought me happiness and a desire that was unique.

It could be us together.

I loved that you cared about the world and wanted to change it, I admired you.

Each conversation went further, each time something new to explore, something new to learn.

About the world, about you...

You sent me poetry and studied art, passions that I wanted to nurture.

I wanted to take care of you, love you, and never let the world hurt you.

Fix your closet, unpack your car, wash your dishes, whatever it took to make life easier... together.

I thought I could protect you, but I didn't think of one thing.

That my callousness from life would transcend, and hurt this beating heart in front of me.

Your heart needed to be cared for and listened to. Your words weren’t random musings but feelings that I blinded myself to.

It wasn’t about the dangers of the world, it was you telling me “don’t die… I want you here!” It was a care I never felt before and a softness I never understood.

No challenge, no daring just a soft whisper saying stop... think of more.

A joined heart... A life that wanted more, a bestfriend and love that could be real.

Think of what I've overcome and the doors that I've opened, the chances I've taken. For you, for us.

Understand the time I need and the trust it takes!

How could I not recognize what was in front of me.

Every replay in my mind shows me what I did.

Every mistake I've learned from leaves me wanting to go back.

Wanting to be with you.

There is, and will only be one of you. Complex and unique.

No same smile or salt and pepper hair. No same life experience.

Your hands made me scrambled eggs and thats the only part that mattered.

That you were there, we were together.

An open heart, a new adventure. A love to build.

"And when they arrive they are just plain scrambled eggs and the warm weather is holding..."